Mbutterfudge

Discovering the new, remember the old.

Stumbling upon the most wonderful blog yesterday, by the sweetest lady in North Yorkshire called Lucy, was a real joy.  Her crochet, photographs and writing are so inspiring.  I got swept up in reading her archives, and once the children were in bed I had to start the below wrist warmers. 

As Lucy explains (oh so well) these are really simple to make, just a rectangle with the thumb hole being created when you stitch up the side seam.

Her writing really makes you feel that you can do her designs.  Her colour works are just fabulously cheerful.  I would love to dash out today to my local wool shop and buy lots of Debbie Bliss, but Santa needs me to be careful.  These really would make the most wonderful gifts though, so maybe a little shopping trip can be justified.  But I am not sure I can trust myself not to start Lucy's fabulous crocheted bag instead.  Its just beautiful.

Over the weekend I finished Genevieve's leg warmers.  Wearing them first thing Sunday morning with her pyjamas, and then later as wrist/arm warmers, so I think they were a hit.

During last week I did manage to make the promised lunch bags, but didn't get around blogging, I just don't know where the time goes.  The children are happy with their new bags (Antonia's didn't make the photo).  I am not completely happy with them, so will, when I get a minute, make some more.  I really love Harris' green bag the best.   

Today the lunches have some of the below yummy Gingerbread included.  This sticky, wonderfully aromatic cake is so comforting and warming.  It always surprises me how "liquidy" the batter seems when you put it in the oven, it doesn't look like it could possibly be right, but it does.

Finally, I had to write about how much I love Ebay.  I won these perfect 1984 Beano comic's for Harris' christmas.  A whole years worth for no money at all, in wonderful condition.  They just don't make comics like this anymore.  The soft paper here, is so tactile.  The smell, all papery and booky.  A really pleasure.  Harris' gets a bit overwhelmed reading books, he really lacks confidence in himself, but a comic seems (to him) more fun.  He will treasure these, I just know it.  He'll read these and then draw from them.  Hours of fun.

A few weeks ago I had taken him to Boarders to buy a comic especially for us to read together, and the choice was so terrible, and so expensive.  Everything was just full of adverts, and nonsense, they seem to have lost their magic.  Children make their choices based on what free toy is attached, which seems so sad to me. 

Bring back the paper comic.  We miss you. 

When I was 17 I worked in Victoria, London, and used to buy a certain newspaper for the train just because it had a Garfield cartoon inside.  Cartoons, were always what I doodled growing up, easy to draw, rewarding to create.  I remember looking forward to reading that small cartoon, setting me up for the day.  Silly really.  But I still adore Garfield books.

I am so excited to have these comics tucked away and hope to find some more for the girls as well.  Thats if I have any money left after my wool shopping.X

 

Cake, Christmas & Chocolate, both goodX

Honestly, there is something about preparing a Christmas Cake that just feels so homely.  I make no apologies for making a christmas cake, I know they can be bought, but I enjoy the whole process so much.  And I am not the only one, Harris and Genevieve even get excited about mixing up the dried fruit, candied peel and (delicious) brandy the night before the cake can be baked.  Antonia just loves the whole theatre of preparing our cake, and she really loves the cake itself, where Harris and Genevieve will only eat the icing.  But thats okay, its not just about the eating, its the preparing, the ritual, the tradition.

Tonight the bowl sits in the corner of our kitchen, covered in a red gingham tea towel (clean, of course), and was peeped at with giggled excitement before bed, even by Greg.  Christmas is coming. Eeek!

They'll look forward to seeing the cake, and especially will rush to be involved in the "feeding" over the next few weeks.  And the smell of brandy is not for the faint hearted, I have friends who can't take it, but my 3 seem to not mind.

I always make Delia's Classic Christmas Cake, it really is the best.   

 
Another cake I seem to return to again and again is a simple sponge with 4 tablespoons of Green & Blacks Hot Chocolate Drink added.  The chocolate is small, tiny chunks of really good chocolate, which hold their shape. 

I take the cake out earlier than I normally bake a sponge for, so that its really moist. I don't ice it.  It's much loved here.  I like to bake it at night, so that I get to lick the bowl :o) X

 

Its a really sunny day and this should work.

I'm not having much luck this weekend with things.  I seem to have lost some wool.  And my baking was iffy. 

But, it is a new week.  A new beginning.  I am feeling optimistic, shock horror. :o)  Will the above work?  I'm hoping this avocado seed will sprout roots.   Its flat side is down in the water, suspended with pins.  Its should take between 3-6weeks, as long as its kept somewhere warm and dark.  Fingers crossed, hey ho.  They make really nice house plants, by all accounts. 

Letting the avocado pear turn almost bad was hard.  Using an unripe pear, tends not to work.  I love them, but they are so full of calories, and I am still counting.  So, against all my instincts it wasn't eaten.

However the diet went right out the window yesterday.  I "attempted" to make profiter rolls.  But they didn't rise.  Ahem..I think it was because I opened the oven a few times, to stir a casserole!  I've made these 100 times, isn't that funny how sometimes things just don't go right.
 

Covered in Green & Blacks chocolate and filled with cream, they were re-named "Mums profiter flats", and tasted great.  They were devoured with giggles and enthusiasm.  Its hard to tell from the above photo, but Genevieve was covered in spots of chocolate, she really loved them.  After which, a long walk was called for.

Why does all the naughty food taste soo good? X
 

2 eggs can make...

...a  plate of macaroons.  I had to force myself to let these cool down, and share them.  I could have easily hidden with the whole plate in my room, while watching Marley and Me again.  (Having a naughty labrador ourselves, we all identified with and really loved this movie.  Although we cried buckets it was great to all share in really laughing hard.)  It's definitely a film to buy for Christmas, with the extra 1hrs worth of troublesome puppy out-takes.

Only the egg whites are used for macaroons, so I had a go at making mayonnaise with the yokes, assisted the lovely Nigella and by the very curious Genevieve.  We were shocked by how much oil was needed.  Oddly, I could have sworn I'd made this before.  But I can't have. 

Anyway, the macaroons were fabulous, and all have now gone.  The mayonnaise was gross, and thrown away.  You can't win them all X 
 

My own worst enemy

I have a tendency to be a huge pessimist.  It can embarrass me and mine.  My mouth opens sometimes before my brain registers, before I shout to myself "be cheerful".  Blogging is my way of focusing on "the good stuff".

I bumped into a good friends husband the other day, on the school run.  And he asked me how I was; a simple question, although I know, full well, its not really meant as a question, just as a polite sentence we throw out there when we meet people.  Especially on the school run, which I hate btw.  Everyone is busy, stressed, tired....  

Anyway, I digress, my friends husband asked kindly how I was.  And I almost burst into tears!  I was fine 2 seconds before that.  I was fine, well, stressed and tired but thats just like everyday.  I looked at Harris and Genevieve and just started rambling "Well you know I'm having one of those days, when I seem to be sinking.  I'm trying to study, trying to get through housework, baking, homework, dog walking, finish some knitting, read my book, hold a conversation with my distant teenager...and I seem to be doing nothing well.  I can't seem to finish anything I start.  I don't know how you guys teach, prepare, parent, run a home..." 

Thankfully my friends husband, who is a senior school teacher,(they both are) calmly said, without judgement, "Don't worry, there's no secret advice other parents know that you don't.  We're all just getting through another day.  You realise that you can't do a good job at everything.  Not as a parent, at your work, at home.  We do do the best we can.  You have to tune out the "guilt".  Just do what you can do." 

I felt like the time 5years ago another good friend told me I didn't have to iron clothes!  I had just had Genevieve and was really struggling under the new routine and sheer exhaustion.  She told me to just wash and dry the clothes mountain, then put things away folded.  A Dah Dah moment, for sure.

I went home and got through the craziness of our dinner/evening time.  Quietly.  Thinking over those kind words.  I need to relax.  Make todo lists.  Finish things, before starting something else.  Pace myself.  Relax.  

If any other friend had discussed their worries about juggling motherhood, home, studying, working I would have probably offered the same advice, so, why had I let myself feel like I was drowning.  Why do we let that happen?  Why do we not see things?  I know I'm not the only one who feels this.

So today, I've baked fruit cake and scones with Genevieve (still home, recovering from tonsillitis), finally and peacefully made a granny square (chilled out, away from books), and planned my next weeks advertising campaign with some new Moo business cards. 

Last night I finished Eat Pray Love.  I so could easily run away to a retreat right now.  All that silence and prayer, and bloody good food. 

I will try to remind myself to step back when it all feels too much. 

Ahem...incidentally, the fruit cake was baked for too long, and the scones are too small and didn't rise...see...pessimism.X

10 things that are making me happy.

1. New material (Heather Bailey) to line my Irish Moss Stitch Bag.

2. A book, by the fabulous Sarah Raven.  I also would love this and this.  

3. Cord skirts and warm tights make me happy.  Excuse the wrinkles.

4. Watching my son do really, really well at his first ruby game.  It really is a tough game.

5. Witnessing the magic of antibiotics.  Genevieve is doing so much better.

6. Bringing some tender plants indoors; it has been very cold here.

7. Finding Haagen-Dazs Baileys ice-cream £1 cheaper than normal.

8. Finding my Seven Brides for Seven Brothers dvd.

9. Being given flowers by a friend, for no reason at all.

10. Loosing 21 pounds in weight since July.  (....bugger, I've bought Haagen-Dazs.  Aww, never mind)  Whoo Hoo!  X

New changes

Things have been really busy here.  School started back. Which is always more stressful and chaotic than I remember, always.  I hate nametag sewing, there's such alot of it.  Luckily Greg normally does this.  He is actually a much much neater sewer than I could ever be.  Sadly patching up and nametags are enough for him, I can't get him near an embroidery needle, LOL.

Getting back into the routine of early starts and homework is never easy.  Especially after such a fun, warm summer.  Its been so cold here some mornings.  The new winter coats have been used a few times already.  It seems so cruel to cart them off to school in the cold.  But the summer holidays are over.

My little garden is really feeling the change in weather.  Autumn is coming.  Lots of little pots are being moved about, either into the greenhouse, to sleep till next year, or just tided up and tucked away.  The sedums (below) and heuchera's are beautiful though and so welcoming.  They're still full of bees.

 

On a walk on Sunday we collected some beautiful plums, 4lbs worth.  They made a delicious compote, 7 jars!  Harris collected the most, and he labeled the jars with so much pride.  Its so good on chocolate brioche (a new discovery here!  How have we never eaten these before?)

 

These little vegetable samosas are also really popular.  Made with leftover veg curry, they've been a hit in the school bentos. 

 

On other news; I've got my first 2 gardening jobs!  Eeek!  Both re-vamps, and quite big jobs.  I am so nervous.  Greg and I have been working on a web site, which I'm hoping to have up and running soon.  These things take ages.  Its all go now.  No turning back. 

I'm trying not to concentrate on the things I don't know yet (there is so much to learn), or the names of plants I just can't retain, trying to just think calmly.  I guess once I get these first few jobs I'll grow in confidence.  But until then; I can't read enough, listen to enough (gardening podcasts), talk enough about plants, visit enough gardens.  I won't sleep again.  Will I understand their vision, will they like my ideas, or will they want something ultra modern, and god forbid minimal?  Which I'd find near on impossible.  Actually starting to freak out again....  I may never sleep again.

When I started stressing out earlier about someone moving some college books, Harris looked at me, pointed his (4th) plum compote filled brioche at me and said, "Mum, calm.  May the force be with you", and then he kind of blessed me, in an Obi-Wan Kanobi style!  I should be fine now, right?

Wish me luckX

Blackberry Friendship Jam

 

I could eat this straight out of the jar.  Its sweetly moreishly delicious, and still pleasantly sharp.  So good.

 

An afternoon spent with the very best of friends, picking, eating, laughing, and just being together in eachothers company.  We love them. 

Oh and the kids got to use really big sticks, which apparently was so awesome!

 

Good friends, being patient and kind, effortlessly.

Just over 7lb was collected!  All the nettle stings were soon forgotten.  The elation we all felt was worth all the hard work, and spiked fingers.

Shared in half, between the two families, resulted in 4 jars of delicious "Blackberry Friendship Jam".   So good.X

The last few days...

Our friend Francis brought us a bag of plums he'd foraged.  We made jam.  I want this Book, for exactly this reason. 

 

It was gooood.

 

The uglier the cucumber the more fun they are to pick and munch.

 

The sun came out and warmed our cold bones and the garden.

 

Our blackberries will be ready any day.  Its a waiting game.  One turned this afternoon, much to Genevieve's delight, "it definitely wasn't cooked this morning!", apparently :o)

 

Our Sunday walk took us by some....elephants...in the English countryside....errr okay..XX

 

Oh and I got some 3 more piercings...nothing rude...fun though...you'll have to wait a while for the photos.  Take careX

Some distractions

Today's been spent rushing around; the school run, the vets, shopping arriving, whizzing through chores.  Just so I can enjoy the Tour de France in the afternoon.  Its so compelling.  I love it.  An excuse to put away the study books for a bit and start a new knitting project.  Very quietly. 

 

Thumbing through new library books.

 

Falling Cloudberries is wonderful. 

 

Setting out the after school snacks...such a distraction indeed.  Which would you choose?X